Rough Draft Webcomic Coming Soon

by on September 7, 2024 at 9:57 am
Posted In: Uncategorized

So as some of you may know, I’ve gotten into digital drawing in recent months. Yet despite being a beginner artist with still a LOT to learn, the urge to start producing a webcomic of one of my stories has been getting harder and harder to resist.

So, I figured, why not? Essentially what I plan on doing is to start posting a rough draft of the webcomic, ie, an actual webcomic just with beginner level art with the intent to redo everything some years down the road. I don’t think the story would change much between this rough draft and the final draft whenever I get good enough to post that.

Is this impatient of me? Probably. Do I care? Not so much. I just really want to share my story with the world already after working on it for 5 years and producing a webcomic seems like it has fewer hoops to jump through than getting a novel published.

I don’t know when I’ll start posting the rough draft on here as I’ve only just started working on a couple pages for it but I do hope to start posting it before the end of this year. I already have a tab in the menu for the rough draft comic with a logline, synopsis, and character art posted already. I hope y’all enjoy it when I do start posting.

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Updates to Life and Stories

by on March 14, 2024 at 9:08 pm
Posted In: Life Updates

Hey there, readers! I’m back with another blog post.

Updates. Revelations. Let’s get into it.

Firstly, I have made the unfortunate revelation of just how stupid insurance is. I noticed a couple weeks ago that my insurance wasn’t paying for my therapy bills and I asked the mental health facility as to why and they said it might be because my deductible is too high and that insurance typically doesn’t start paying your bills until the deductible is paid off. So I double-checked my deductible because I never knew enough about them before to pay attention to mine…

And it’s over $9,000 and only about $1,400 is paid off so far three months into the year. At this rate I’m probably not going to pay off the deductible before the year is even over which means I’ll be paying all my medical bills myself… What even is the point of insurance if it doesn’t pay anything for you?

Ugh. Maybe I should’ve made a doctor’s appointment during my sick week just to pay the deductible a little more. Oh, my sick week? Yeah, at the tail end of February and beginning of March I had the worst cold I’ve had in a long while. Yes, it was a cold. Yes, I tested negative for covid. No, I did not have a fever. It didn’t help that my period decided to start at the exact same time so for a whole week I was dealing with scratchy/sore throat, runny/stuffy nose, period cramps/bleeding, and nearly passing out from a shower on top of a five-day work week because right up until the last work day I was convinced it was just a reaction to the change in weather. Fun times.

Luckily I had put in a PTO request a couple weeks prior so after my work week was done I had a whole five days off to recover with. Got caught up on some movies I’d been wanting to see: Across the Spider-verse, Wakanda Forever, the Mario Movie (admittedly I got distracted about halfway through and kinda stopped watching it). I also watched Talladega Nights (one of the worst movies I have ever seen) because my younger sister has been dissing animation for a long while and said that if I watched this movie (which she somehow likes) then she’d watch something I recommend. Neither of us liked each other’s recommendations which is vastly disappointing.

Aside from just watching movies, I also made chocolate chip cookies and chocolate chip waffles during my days off and had an art tablet delivered on the first of my five off days. Yes, I got the tablet sooner than I said I might. I couldn’t resist and decided I needed the pick-me-up about halfway through my sick week. I’ve done pretty well with it so far, drawing a few of my characters and reworking each character design. You can even see a genuine progression in skill with how I’ve gone about them. It’s been a nice distraction from my complete lack of progress with my writing this month.

I had stopped writing around the time my cold started and have only very recently gotten back into writing. Though I haven’t written anything for my stories today as I wanted to do this post and am counting these words toward my weekly writing goal. Though I have figured out a sorta good way to encourage me to write.

So, I bought a sharing size bag of mini M&Ms and decided to make each piece count towards 25 words written so if I write say, 600 words I can treat myself to 24 mini M&M pieces. It’s such a small amount of such small candy that it’s not a lot of calories or sugar and even if I go into higher word counts it still wouldn’t be too terrible. Though if I’m being honest, my productivity sprints only reach as far as about 700 or so words in a single sitting and usually only once per day so eating too much candy in a day isn’t really likely to occur unless I break my “candy only as a reward for writing” rule.

I also fell behind on my reading during my cold and still have trouble getting myself to read anything, even with audiobooks. I have finished one book this month which was really good. Four and a half stars. For those wondering: Maya and the Return of the Godlings by Rena Barron. It’s a middle grade fantasy and the second in a trilogy.

Sick week aside, another life update is that I bought a coat rack and reorganized my shelves. Not an exciting update perhaps but I’m happy about it. With my jacket, coat, and purse hung up on the coat rack the tops of my shelves are now free space for whatever mail I get that I don’t have anywhere else to put other than somewhere on the shelves. And with the mail now resting on the tops of the shelves, the actual shelf space feels less cluttered and cramped. The entire bottom row of shelves are now empty and my books are all arranged in a much more aesthetic alignment so my décor fits better.

I also have décor now which is astonishing for me as I’m fairly minimalist by nature just because I don’t like most aesthetic pieces but I saw a rainbow lamp at the dollar store one day and was actually drawn to it and later got a second one as well as a rainbow felt message board and a knight chess piece shaped ceramic thing. My shelves look so much nicer now.

Now, moving past the life updates, let’s discuss something a little more important. My writing. I restarted draft 8. Again. This is WIP 1 I’m referring to. Originally, I had the story start with a character’s prophetic dream but recently I started doubting the presence of this, especially in the beginning because the story is a sci-fi novel and prophetic dreams (even if it’s an ability with alien origins the character themself is unaware of) feel more like a fantasy element. So I’ve decided to restart this particular rewrite and in doing so restructure the inciting incident of the novel.

I’ve made other changes to how the plot unfolds due to thinking a bit harder on some of the plot points that occur that I realized lately weren’t fleshed out enough. Namely the fallout of a character’s major injury and the protagonist team’s escape from an alien space station.

Regarding other writing I’ve been doing, I’ve been working on a TMNT fanfic lately that blends elements from various iterations of the turtles, namely IDW, Rise, and 2003 but with a dark!Leo twist to it. However, I’ve been considering plotting out an ATLA rewrite fic instead in reaction to the Netflix adaptation doing it badly and kind of wanting to try my hand at a reboot story. I already have so many ideas in my head from Aang keeping his Avatar status a secret for longer (so them leaving the South Pole is more of a survival escape reason than “Avatar must learn the elements” reason) to Teo being a massive fan of the air nomads and lovingly recreating items from air nomad culture like a true glider (he still makes his version too because his doesn’t require airbending) and an air bison whistle (which were banned in the Southern Air Temple because the kids used them in pranks too much). Not sure if I’ll actually write this or not. But it would be fun.

But yeah, that’s about all for now. Thanks for reading!

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2024 Goals and Maybe Plans

by on February 25, 2024 at 10:36 pm
Posted In: Life Updates

Greetings everyone! This account is back from the dead yet again. Figured I could write this instead of drafting anything in either of my WIPs.

So, it’s 2024 and we’re already two months into the year so far. What are my goals, my resolutions, my plans for the year?

As far as goals go, writing and reading more is always a priority and thus far I’ve been doing fairly well at both. In January I wrote a little over 13,000 words and read 5 books. Another goal has been to save money this year and January has been a tremendous success. February is a different story. I wish I could blame it on February being too short to have sufficient income but in reality it’s because I had to pay out of pocket for CPAP supplies (they don’t take my current insurance) and I went out shopping with my mom.

I don’t regret the shopping trip though. Most of what I bought was a need. Such as new jeans for work and a dress for my grandma’s funeral (RIP Grandma Ruth, she was 91). Though I won’t lie and say it was solely needs. I just couldn’t resist picking up a couple items from the book section or a second cake pan from the cooking isle (I only had one round and most cake boxes say you need two and I’m thinking of making my own birthday cake this year).

Hopefully I can save more moving forward. Another goal I’ve had is to post to social media every day and so far I have only missed once. I did have the goal of going on walks more often but it’s hard to muster up the energy or motivation to do so when you work on your feet most days. Speaking of, I recently switched from a 4-day work week to a 5-day work week. I needed it. They raised my rent this year and I was already struggling to not lose money as it was so the extra money in my paycheck is nice.

As for other plans for the year I intend to try out my new crock pot on Tuesday to make ribs for the first time in my life. My original plan was to just put the ribs in and drown them in BBQ sauce and let that simmer for like 8-9 hours on low but someone at work today suggested against that. I’ll have to look up how to cook them now. I’ve also lately had the itch to learn how to draw. I’ve done some drawings in the past (over a year ago now) on my phone which haven’t turned out bad. Pictures below (1-5 are from the same story; [also all of these were made using just my finger on ibisPaint X, no stylus or anything just a lot of determination and frustration]).

But drawing on a phone is difficult and so I’ve been considering purchasing an art tablet recently so I can develop some skills as an artist. Honestly, I just want to be able to draw the characters in my books and turn them into graphic novels. I know it would still take me a long time to develop art skills and honestly even just developing an art style seems difficult but the older I get the more I yearn to bring my characters to life in my own way. Ya know? Might buy the art tablet as a birthday present for myself when May rolls around. I get three paychecks that month anyway so one could argue that a hefty purchase is justifiable.

But yeah that’s been my goals and plans for the year. Hopefully I’m successful at them. This has been Megan, signing out.

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It’s Been Awhile

by on November 17, 2023 at 7:55 pm
Posted In: Uncategorized

Wow, has it really been over a year since I last posted on here? Damn. At this point I don’t really know what to say. I set up this website a couple years ago or so because I wanted to build a following for whenever I finally publish a book but given my lack of posting, you can take a wild guess as to how building said following is going.

I wish I could say I’ve been writing a lot lately, but that would be a lie. If anything, I’ve been writing less now than I was when I last posted. Partly the seasonal depression, partly just losing interest in the story I’m currently working on. Don’t get me wrong. I still love the concept. Just the plot feels like its dragging right now and I can’t tell if that’s a result of my seasonal depression creeping in or if I’m just bored with what I have outlined.

This would normally be when I distract myself by writing a side project. Only problem is my side project as of late has been a fanfic which I haven’t fully outlined. And by not fully outlined, I mean I have already written basically every single scene I have outlined thus far. I am not a person who does well without at least some sort of outline so proceeding with that story without having more plotted out is a bit daunting at the moment.

I tried taking a week long break last month to get back into the mood for writing but even when that 1 week lapsed into a week and a half, I still can’t seem to get back into the groove of things. I hope it’s just seasonal depression and that the light therapy my psychiatrist very recently recommended helps. Just ordered it today. We’ll see how well it works.

Now if you’ve read my last post, you might be wondering why I’d need light therapy if my emotional support animal was supposed to help with my depression.

Well, I never got an ESA because my landlord put a bunch of bullshit requirements on me having one that I’m not entirely sure they are legally allowed to require (must be declawed and I have to pay extra rent for the animal) and at first I didn’t have the means to contact a lawyer to inquire about that and nowadays I’m more worried about lacking the funds to take care of myself, let alone another living being. So, no cat for me. Boo.

The good news is that I’ve gotten a lot better at making my mom’s chili recipe since I last posted (I did indeed burn it the first time). I’ve also made pork chops and shrimp scampi, the latter of which I had just yesterday. Yum!

So, cooking has been helpful in my diet, though I still weigh quite a bit. 198 pounds last I checked. I did try the weight management program for almost a year but got frustrated with my lack of progress and when it turned out that moving out meant I lost out on my mom’s Medicaid insurance, I kinda quit the program. I have new insurance now, not Medicaid but still decent. I also got diagnosed with sleep apnea and now use a CPAP machine which has greatly improved my quality of sleep. Further, I had my medication increased a couple months back and while the effects have mellowed out since I first started taking the increased dose, the initial upping did give me a greatly improved mood and productivity.

I wish I could get that back.

Nowadays I’m working on getting my budget under control. When I tell you I started 2023 with a little over $5,000 in savings and now only have $2,000 in my savings account, I am not kidding. Though I greatly wish I was. RIP my poor wallet. Adulting is more expensive than I realized when I first moved out.

I might put writing on hold again until either the light therapy arrives and starts to work or until my ideas stop feeling stale. Maybe try outlining and writing more of the fanfic ideas I have rattling around in my head instead (there are about a half dozen). Or perhaps I could work on that draft 8 rewrite for my backburner project some more.

I still have to outline most of it, but as I don’t plan on changing it too, too much from the initial story I drafted it wouldn’t be too hard to work on it more. Though the more I work on it the more I wonder if I should go ahead and try and query it once draft 8 is done despite being the first in a 5 book series. Not exactly an easy sell to agents and publishers.

If I had more money, I might consider self-publishing it, but alas I have neither the funds nor the marketing skills to succeed in the self-publishing sphere.

Oh well, 26 years old now and still a mess. Fingers crossed I actually get my life together before 30. Maybe I’ll actually get around to setting up a YouTube channel this year now that I have a tripod. Probably a bullet journalling one at first just because that seems less daunting than an authortube or booktube channel. Could evolve into such one day but let’s hope I get the bullet journalling one done first. Peace out, readers!

PS: if you don’t hear from me before the New Year, please comment on this post and tell me to blog something else soon. Please. I don’t want to neglect this site any longer.

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Life Update – August 9th, 2022

by on August 9, 2022 at 1:37 pm
Posted In: Uncategorized

Hey there, readers. I’m back for a life update again. What has been going on since I last wrote here?

Well, I turned 25 back in May and it was a very good birthday. I started bullet journaling back in June (technically May-ish as I had to design the bullet journal spreads for the months of June/July before actually utilizing them). I’ve gotten really into it and it’s working even better for me than my Clever Fox planners since those often have extraneous features that I don’t really use much. I also started renting my very first apartment. Yay, adulting! Prior to moving in, I had also made some progress on getting more productive with my writing and reading which improved my mood greatly. Yay! But the move-in process and trying still to get used to living on my own has kind of derailed everything back to step one and sent me back into a depressive state. Not yay.

This whole adjustment period which started back in late June-early July is especially hard because I don’t know how to cook so my diet has been primarily Doordash food which has caused a fair bit of weight gain that I believe has been causing me sleep problems and has probably contributed to my depressive state. I have appointments at the end of August with a sleep study (regarding possible sleep apnea caused by the weight gain) and with a weight management specialist since I do not for the life of me know how to lose weight on my own.

I’m hopeful that the weight management will help but without knowing how to cook I don’t know how much progress can be made. I’d like to have my mom teach me but she recently purchased her own home a few towns away that she and my sister are busy trying to move into so she’s not exactly available to do so. Could I just try my hand at cooking on my own? Perhaps, but I’m not very confident in how that would go as I’m very much the type of person who needs help/demonstration with hands-on learning such as this. With it seeming like my mom won’t be available to teach me until September and me not wanting to live off of primarily Doordash for two months straight, I may just try to cook the one recipe she’s given me thus far (her chili sauce, my favorite) and hope I don’t burn it or undercook it.

My mom says I’m more likely to burn it as I’m very paranoid about meat being even slightly pink. She might be right. I don’t know.

Aside from diet and weight, my mood is of course a problem still, as stated earlier. Living on my own has been lonelier than I expected, and my therapist has suggested an Emotional Support Animal to improve my mood. I’m very heavily considering this, though with some fairly hefty purchases recently (my mom has back issues and has wanted/needed an adjustable bed for ages and I had some money in savings to buy one for her; her mattress was like 15 years old anyway, so she needed a new bed regardless) I’m thinking of putting this off until next month.

When I do get an ESA though I plan on getting a cat because they’re lower energy, don’t need as much attention, use litter boxes instead of needing to be taken out, and aren’t very loud. As an out of shape introvert who works odd hours, having a pet I don’t have to worry about being lonely or shitting the apartment when I’m at work is a huge plus.

Now, as for my productivity going up for a bit and then plummeting once I moved, why don’t I just go back to the previous routine to get my groove back? Well, because my routine back then involved walking to the library on my days off and with how broiling hot and humid it’s been I just don’t feel like doing that anymore. Plus, I had hoped that I’d be able to get into a new routine upon moving into my new place. It didn’t work out so I’ve deleted YouTube from my Roku device in the hopes that will help me become productive again. We’ll see. That was a very recent change.

I do think if I go back to the beginning of my routine building strategy (of setting a very low word goal at once a week and then slowly building up the days per week count and then daily word goal) that I probably will get back into the swing of things, but I’ve been kind of stuck in my writing for long enough that I’m mostly trying to focus on the outlining and general planning of things so as to slowly ease back into the writing process.

Regarding my reading, however, I have been doing much better with that and even read 4-ish books last month. 4-ish as in I read 3 books and the back half of Young Avengers: The Complete Collection Volume 1 by Allen Heinberg that I started late last year and never got around to finishing until July. Yes, I know booktubers read like 10 books a month but I’m not that voracious of a reader, okay. 4 books is pretty decent for me. I’m currently in the middle of a Percy Jackson reread and on Battle of the Labyrinth which is as of chapter 4, funnier than I remember it being. Though as I remember very little of it, I can’t say I remember how funny it was at all. Regardless, I’m enjoying my time revisiting these books.

Looking back on my previous life update where I said I was considering starting a YouTube channel, I am still considering it and have been more and more interested in the idea of doing a bullet journal channel but the main obstacle for me with actually committing to doing that is that I don’t have a camera/tripod that would allow for filming over the table, ie hanging the camera over the bullet journal to film it from above for flip-throughs and such. I’ve tried finding tripods on Amazon so I can use my phone but the descriptions of the ones I’ve seen don’t often tell if it does allow the camera to hang over the table. If anyone has any recommendations for tripods please let me know.

Let’s see, what else? Well, regarding work, I’ve been more stressed out lately as I have been working mornings and specifically weekend mornings more than I had at the time of the last update and as a night owl, that did not work well for me, especially when compounded by the stress of the huge change of going from living with my mom to living on my own. I’ve asked my manager to take me off mornings which she has done her best to accommodate given how short-staffed we’ve been since this one employee is currently on a month-long leave. I can only hope that things work out from here on out.

I’m thinking of getting back into blogging and also switching my therapy from biweekly sessions to weekly ones. My sisters have also suggested I ask my psychiatrist about maybe upping my meds since they are mood stabilizers and my mood as previously stated has been kind of shit lately. My next appointment with her isn’t until the end of the month so it will be a while before I can ask about that.

Overall, I’ve just been through a lot these past few months and it’s been taking its toll on me, especially the lack of productivity with my writing as I’m getting impatient to finally publish my work. Unfortunately, as none of my writing is anywhere near publishable, it’s still a far-off dream at the moment. I know this. I’m trying to be patient but the desire to have someone other than me read my stories is agonizing. I’ve been working on maybe getting back into writing fanfictions just as a way to appease my writerly need for someone else to read something that came from my brain. Still, the desire to be productive is overpowered by my lack of ability to develop productive skills. I can only hope to figure this all out soon.

So, yeah, that’s about all I have for you today, readers. TTYL!

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